Fortieth Day

- Can I ask you a question, Sir?

- Go ahead.

- Why am I here?

- You are being detained in accordance with English law on suspicion of involvement with terrorists cells operating…

- I know, I know. But that tells me nothing, does it? If you ask a waiter what is on the menu, surely you would want to here something more than “oh, a wide variety of original and tasty dishes, prepared using only the best ingredients from all over the world”. That would tell you just as much about the actual selection as your answer has informed me of why I’m actually here, tell me if I’m wrong.

- Well, we had hoped that you would give us the answers. Why do you think you are here. Use your imagination.

- I only know what you have told me - that I am here because of something that has to do with M. Surely you must have realised by now though that I have nothing to do with him. That you were wrong from the beginning. Is that why I am still being held here? Because you don’t want to admit to yourselves that you made a mistake capturing me in the first place? Or do you really think that I will rush home to make petrol bombs together with M as soon as you release me?

- What do you think?

- Don’t give me that! For fuck’s sake don’t give me that! I’m not stupid you know - I know there must be something or else I wouldn’t be here. It’s been forty days now and I have tried hard, indeed used the full capacity of my imagination to come up with possible explanations as to why I’m being held here. I have tried to decipher every conversation I have had with M in search of hidden messages, I have attempted to go through just about everything I have done or said to anyone in the past year, and I still don’t know. I’m only asking you out of curiosity - why am I here - and all you ask me to do is to think about it! I tell you what - I’m not going to think about it any more. I am just going to accept that I don’t know, and it comforts me to know that you don’t seem to have a clue either.

- First of all, I never thought you were stupid. No one does. People who end up here seldom are, and even more rarely do they spend their time making petrol bombs. Second, you should know that we are not stupid either. Trying to provoke or insult me won’t do you any good - if you are clever enough you’ll realise that. Third, it must certainly have crossed you mind that we’re being extremely gentle with you. You cannot think that this is how we treat all our “guests”. If someone withholds information from us that we deem necessary for us to acquire, we usually find a way to get it. In you case...let’s just say we are slightly curious about certain things and that you’ll know when our interest grows stronger. And frankly, I don’t really care whether or not you know why you’re here so long as we get something out of it - and whether we do is for us to decide.

- In that case, I certainly hope you have low standards, or else you must be terribly disappointed by know.

- As I said, that is for us to decide, and in my humble opinion we do possess the greater expertise in that respect. And I believe we are done for today. Take him away.

That’s it. Today’s interrogation word by word as accurate as I can remember it. And if I fail miserably to see the reason why I am being detained, I struggle equally to see in what way our conversation can be of any use to them. But that’s their problem, not mine. I am merely here as guest to still the curiosity of my hosts.